Lessons Learned
Posted on December 27, 2007 - Filed Under Dear Readers..., breathe, joy
During these last few weeks, my mind has decluttered, my jaw has unclenched and I’ve been able to see a few things - or maybe realize a few things. And possibly understand what people mean when they talk about lessons that life presents for one to learn. It’s been nice to get to know myself again and this few weeks has been more than getting some much needed rest.
I’ve learned that
- I’m not a morning person. Even though I tend to wake up early, I’m only good for coffee and reading until about ten o’clock. No wonder I always groaned when the alarm went off.
- I don’t like being the boss, which is not to say I don’t like being in charge. But being the boss is that horrible crappy job of being between the workers and the owners and it’s terrible. No one likes you, everyone protests what you want them to do and in the end you can’t save people from themselves, despite the fact that that is what you were hired to do.
- I don’t like stress. While this seems obvious, no likes stress, right? Well, I used to think that I did. In fact, I believed that I thrived on it - controversy, being on the edge, pushing the envelope, all that exciting stuff really got my blood and adrenaline pumping. What I didn’t realize is that it was eating me up too. It isn’t actually exciting to live a life filled with conflict and opposition, it’s debilitating.
- A long walk cures just about anything. Put a pair of sneakers on my feet and leash up the doggie and we’re ready. I’ve been forcing myself to walk everyday since I started my ‘vacation’. And despite my grumpy voice protesting its head off and trying to keep me sitting on my fat arse, I somehow manage to get out there each morning. After about 10 minutes, my muscles stop protesting, my breathing regulates and my mind declutters. I start to see what’s all around me, feel the fresh air on my face, in my lungs and the sunshine dancing along my shoulders and it feels good to be alive. Just to be alive.
- Life is too short to be unhappy. Period. It’s a waste of time and energy to live an unhappy life and there is no good reason to do it. Not for friends, family or anyone. No one is served by being a martyr. If you’re in a bad situation, get out of it - it won’t get any better and no one will appreciate your sticking it out and suffering in their behalf.
- Money doesn’t matter all that much to me. I only need it for the things that I need, which isn’t much. It’s better to make less money and be happy in your work, with a heart and mind at peace than it is to have to practically kill yourself to have lots of money so you can have lots of things. Who needs things?
- I have my own pace and rhthym. I don’t like to hurry or to hit the ground running. I like to wake up the way a flower opens to the sun, slowly and deliberately. I want to see the day that is unfolding in front of me, not rush past it in my race to get to somewhere that I can see nothing but the next task to be done.
- I like myself. I really didn’t know that and maybe I didn’t believe that. But I know it now.
- I am truly loved. Again something I didn’t know or believe- but now I do
I suppose I could go on and on, as things like this tend to do so but I’ll leave it here. How about you, what have you learned lately?
Annie
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16 Responses to “Lessons Learned”
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Wonderful post. Everyone should have this opportunity to reflect on themselves and life and see what the really important things are. Number 3 was of special interest to me because many people claim to work better under stress but I don’t think they truly know what they are saying. I think many people may find they work more efficiently when they know they have a dealine or a specific goal but I think it is just as you said - and that it does eat away at you. Also, life is too short to spend it unhappy. You have so many good points. And I am soooooo happy you realize that you are loved. That has got to be such a big feeling, such a wonderful feeling, such a humbling feeling, and such a freeing feeling. Just such a great post all around!
Hugs to you Annie. Oh, and I see things look a little different around here - very pretty. Plus IT’s SNOWING! 
Hey Teeni,
I think you’re so right about number 3 - people really do think they do better with the stress but it’s a big fat lie. You know?
Yes, I’ve been redecorating - in fact, this is the second theme in less than 24 hours - I liked the other one better but for some reason wouldn’t show the tags - which annoyed me, so I had to change it. I’m kind of liking the dark theme - surprisingly. You can make it snow on your blog too, just go to the ‘extras’ tab, click and then check the snow thingie. Voila, you will have snow. Til Jan 4th anyway.
A
i love your list, Chica.
i am especially happy that you like yourself. i’ve been liking you for a while & it’s nice to have another thing in common with you.
i also love walks but have been slacking. Walks were when i got most of my ideas for stories. i also enjoyed observing what was around. i need to start walking again. i think the move stunned me out of many of my routines.
i’ve learned the simplest things in life bring the highest pleasure. There’s not a whole heck of a lot to do here because it is country, but the tall grass, the smell of pine, the depth of a clear sky and shape of the mountains can occupy my mind, spirit & senses for hours.
i’ve also learned that our elders should be revered. i think our society, more so than others, really tries to put them away, keep them out of sight and discredit them because of our own fears. i’m not afraid of getting older or old anymore.
Something i am beginning to learn is that i am not as stupid as i’ve always believed. i’m kind of smart, actually. This is new to me and i feel embarrassed to even say so.
The biggest lesson is that i can only control myself. My actions and reactions are the ways that i contribute to change. Sometimes i forget, but i am doing so less and less.
i’m happy for you, Chica. Learning is a lifetime event.
~christine
Chica-Chica,
I’m glad we have more in common too, now.
Walks rock! I also get tons of ideas and snatches of poetry swirling while I walk. I don’t know why, maybe because you can sort of let your mind go off on it’s own when you’re walking and you can feel so big, spiritually when you’re looking out at all that space, I guess the mind just naturally goes into its creative gear?
I love what you said about our elders - I agree, completely - we’ve so much to learn and to teach to one another, no one should be ‘put away’
I’m sorry but I had to laugh when you said you realized you’re not as stupid as you believed. Darlin’ you’re very far from being stupid in any sense, I’m glad you know it though.
That control thing got me too - it’s something you really have to realize again and again, isn’t it?
chica
Annie,
I love that you have had such an awakening and that you have learned these lessons and shared them with us. I learn so much, each day. In the last couple of days, I have learned to trust in my instincts, for they always work for me. I always knew this, however sometimes I forget to realize how powerful my instincts are.
Hey Mark,
I’m glad you mentioned instincts, mine used to be pretty good too - but I stopped trusting them some time back - I can feel the wheels turning now. And you’re so right, they are very powerful, I’m glad you re-realized this about yourself.
Annie
life is the journey that never stops teaching…amazing the things we realise when we stop to smell the roses isn’t it?
well, i’ve learnt you have a tagline {not on this theme, but a tagline exists all the same)…
that i can talk forever about nothing and still have a ball…
i have the ability to make the clinking of glass heard all over the world…
i could continue to be facetious, but i won’t…
the biggest teller here for me {about you} was the last one…so nice to see that realisation in words…makes my heart happy…..
great little post chicken…
Hey Girl,
Yeah, that ol’ tagline is there, it just doesn’t like to show itself for some reason. Got no answer as to why. That last one was a shocker, but in a good way.
l/y
A
Wonderful realizations, WC. What is the story of that drawing? It seems very ominous to me.
Hey Windy (I like that as a nickname for you, do you mind? It reminds me of that song…)
I liked the drawing partly because it was ominous - it’s called epiphany. If you look at it, starting from the top, you see it’s very dark but then as it reaches down to the girl there is a bright spot of light that she is focused on - I guess I thought that was the epiphany. I wish I could draw like that.
WC
I am sure all your fans will be happy reading your list, happy for you. I am happy too. Happy because being on the outside it’s always easy to see things, much easier than living it yourself.
My favourite lesson is the second last one. I know when I learnt that one and the cool thing is it is one of those that is hard to forget again…..just keep reading up on it once in a while. My heart smiles for you Annie, thanks for sharing. SP.
LOL Spaz - my fans?
Yes, the last two were a bit tough for me to swallow for a while - but now, not so much. It feels kind of good actually. I think I had this concept all twisted up with being egotistical - but actually it really isn’t, is it?
Thanks for coming by, miss you, we don’t talk much lately.
Annie
Spoken like a woman who truly knows herself, how wonderful Annie. I love that you’re walking everyday and enjoying it (sorry, that’s the trainer in me!)
I too am not a morning person, no matter how hard I try! I have to get up at 4.30/5am 4 mornings a week to train people and I’ve NEVER found it easy, not ONCE!! Sigh! Y
Love ya! xx
You know what I’ve learnt about myself recently? My intuition is a wondrous thing, I’ve just never trusted it enough before - the minute I trusted it - it grew ten-fold
Hello Simonne, my sweet.
Yes, that intuition thing is very powerful, especially when you deny it - it’s like a backward g-tortional slap in the head. I’m glad you’ve learned to trust it again - it will only serve you well.
Oh my, we must never get together for an early morning activity then, eh? We’d have a coffee then talk each other out of going and go back to bed.
love ya,
Annie
All very good revelations.
All stuff I TOTALLY relate to.
All stuff I too came to terms with this past year.
GO YOU!
On a side note, I find that slowing down was one of the greatest choices I made for myself. I can think, I can feel, I don’t get stressed out so easily. I once heard (somewhere) that “man was meant to experience life at a walking pace, not at light-speed.” Once you slow down and allow yourself the time to process, feel, think and digest, suddenly life seems so much brighter and lovelier, easier to manage. Happier.
Hey MS,
A
I love what you said about slowing down - it’s so true. We weren’t meant to experience life at warp speed - what kind of experience is that after all? And life is so much lovelier when you have a chance to catch your breath and that pretty butterfly going by.
In the past six months I have learned that beauty can be found in unexpected places. I have also learned that I don’t like mornings or rap music and that there is no need to be afraid. I have also learned that no matter how bad things get, I can cope. At 42, I finally feel like I am growing up. Thought-provoking post. BTW, I like the new look! Can you also tell me what type of bird you have in your header? He is adorable!
Hi Selma & welcome,
Yes, beauty can be found in unexpected places and that’s the best, isn’t it? Ditto on the rap music (ugh!)
The bird in the header is a Cardinal. They are quite beautiful - I’ve only seen them rarely and never here in California. Though, in winter, when I lived in Michigan, would luck out with an occasional siting - that flash of cardinal red against the white snow is really breathtaking.
WC
Im so happy for you, Annie. You deserve everything good that comes your way.
Thanks, honeybunch - same to you too.
A
these are wonderful lessons
i’ve learned that i am in control of my emotions and i’ve learned that i enjoy the slow hum of my thoughts …
Oooh, I like that - the slow hum of my thoughts - noice!
A
I love these. Some of them are things I’ve learned over time, and some I’m trying to learn but haven’t yet mastered. Thanks for the reminder…
Hi Moenkopi & welcome,
Your url is intriguing, I must get by and see what you’re doing over there. I’m not sure I’ve mastered any of them - but I have learned that they are true for me.
WC
I’m so glad your ‘vacation’ time has been so beautiful and productive for you Annie. I hope that as you start back into a job search sometime in the future that these new revelations about yourself serve you well. Each of us could use a list like this in our search for true happiness, and coming into New Years is a great time for such soul searches.
All the best to you my friend, always.
Jennifer
Gee Jennifer, I never really thought of it as productive - in fact, I was kind of ragging on myself for not being very productive but maybe you’ve a point there. I will have to consider that.
All the best to you too, honey - you deserve it. Hugs to superbaby.
Annie
Sure, you can call me Windy. To me, it looks like the fire will soon be out of control. It looks like that woman had better think twice about her intentions and about the consequences.
Hey Windy,
You know, I guess we are seeing this picture very differently. I think the light above her is the sunshine pushing through the shadows - you think it’s a fire - wow interesting. I may have to think of a way to do a post about this - how one interprets art.
WC
Oh, Annie…..
This is the most beautifully heartfelt post!!! Maybe it’s the soft grays and blacks of your new color palette :)…LOVE it, btw!…..but when I read this, I heard a voice - strong, assured, yet soft and allowing. It was filled with the energy of a woman who’s really tapping into her true essence - and the most important of relationships…the ones we have with ourselves.
Your post inspired me. I’ve felt so drained (not necessarily in a ‘bad’ way…just in that post Christmas, huge exhale sort of way…I haven’t walked in days…but this really encouraged me to go out there. Rather than at the crack of dawn, maybe I’ll try in the late afternoon…
Hugs!
Hey Gracie!
You know, I have crack of dawn walk fantasies but they never come to fruition. Maybe it’s just not what I need the moment I wake up. I like the midday walk - it’s refreshing and opens my mind to possibilities. LOL - if we lived a little closer to each other, we might run into each other on that walk.
Love
Annie
[...] at Writerchick recently posted a list of insights she has recently realized. I thought some of her new found views to be very beautiful and [...]
Thanks for the ping, sweetie. Good post, yours.
A