Welcome to Self-Hosting! You Idiot…
Posted on June 28, 2008 - Filed Under Blogging, Just For Fun, adventure, blog gods
Did you ever wish for something, daydream about it and get those nice warm fuzzy feelings at just the thought of having it? Then by some miracle it actually happens and then find yourself in a constant state of Gobsmackedness by how it really goes? Gone are the gossamer images of the perfect life and skipping across the perfect, still lake like a happy little stone.
Welcome to self hosting. Cripes! Until I started the whole self-hosting adventure, I considered myself to be an intelligent person. Quick on my feet, able to multi-task and always prepared with an answer. Well, I can forget all that, now that I own this blog. Suddenly, all of my complaints about Wordpress don’t seem so valid anymore. Truly, I took for granted what they offered and how easy they made it for anyone with an opinion about anything to publish to the world at large.
Are you thinking about self-hosting? Wanting to break out on your own, maybe make a little money, create your own brand? Well, despite all the thousands of Ebooks floating around and the bagillions of cheap hosting companies, it’s not quite as easy as you may think. In fact, without the help of several friends I’d never have gotten this far.
First of all, you have to get a domain name - easy you say? Well maybe…but if you have an even remotely familar name it’s probably taken - Writer Chick dot com for example was taken - so we had to add the talks on the end of it. Not my first choice but my first choice was taken by someone who basically doesn’t really have anything more than an advertising site. Bummer. Then there is the hosting. Too complicated and unconfrontable for me, so once again, Moe to the rescue. I do have the information, sent in an email, but the need for translations is vital and desperately needed.
Then we move onto the software - luckily you can get it from wordpress, so the format is familar and things are similar…but have you heard of Filezilla and ftp files and can you read CSS, edit themes, widgetize themes, download plugins, know you API key code? And does anybody out there know why Google Analytics refuses to work on my blog? Then of course we move onto adsense (which by the way, doesn’t make a whole lot of sense) affiliate programs, adbrite, turtlewax and cake recipes… So much to learn so little time. Once again, without friends to guide me, I’d be suicidal by now.
So, okay by some miracle it gets all set up but after a few days I don’t like the theme, which btw, I spent hours going through thousands of themes to find - and it has some weird little bugs that are making it difficult to do the simple things - like post a video for example, change headers, blah blah. So onto another theme, tweak, tweak, tweak. Nah, not really crazy about that one either. Okay, let’s peruse another thousand themes just for fun. Oh thank god, they created a pretend site where I could fiddle with this stuff - oh crap this theme make the widgets go psychotic, that one just disappeared my blogroll, that’s just butt ugly. Okay, let’s check again. Finally, we find the theme we are looking for, it works like a charm, I can see my blogroll again and people can actually read it. Yay! Still, Google analytics won’t work no matter wtf we do. Screw it. Who needs it? Not, I, apparently.
Oh and by the way, what happened to my page rank? Gone, you say? I’m starting over so Google is making me start over? Ditto Technorati, every blog directory you’ve listed with and also lots of your readers are still going to the old site where you haven’t posted in weeks. Current page rank for new blog N/A - yup, not even a zero yet. Great!!!! I’m really loving this whole self hosting thing, big time. Kind of like being Ebenezer Scrooge at the boarding school around Christmas time. A little lonely. “But I’m still here,” I chirp to massive echoes and no one there. *Whistling* *Playing Solitaire* Helloooooooooooooo?
Hundreds of emails swapped, late night google chats, hours and hours of figuring out how to find that dang plugin you read about 6 months ago. Yep, we’re having fun now.
Okay, so you’re probably wondering why on earth I decided to do this, given all the stuff involved. Well, first, I didn’t realize all of the many things that were involved, which was probably good because I probably wouldn’t have leapt. So, in this case, ignorance was bliss. Though despite all that and the above, I guess the real answer is that I wanted something that was just mine. Maybe that isn’t a good answer but it’s my answer. It’s a hard thing to explain but I suppose like home ownership, sometimes you just want something that is just you through and through, where you are home and nobody and no thing can do anything without your approval or agreement. Where you are free to create anything that your heart desires and where you can make a true reflection of yourself, good, bad or ugly. Despite the frustration, tears, anger and insanity, I don’t regret it. I revel in it. The possiblity for creativity is endless and I revel in that too. True, it’s not for the faint of heart - but it’s an adventure and sometimes that’s only thing that matters.
Is Blogging Meant to be Therapy?
Posted on March 29, 2007 - Filed Under Blogging, Dear Readers..., Deep thoughts, Feedback, Humor, Life, Opinions, Random Thoughts, WTF?, What If?, Writers, acts of idiocy, acts of valor, adventure, blog gods, brain farts, breathe, clueless, cubicle universe, double yoiks, empty head, funny bone, i dunno, imagination, in my head, meme, motivation, my opinions, possibilities, really stupid shit, voices in my head, writing
You know I haven’t been at this blogging stuff for very long - a few months - though it seems more like years. Or really it seems like something I’ve always done. Perhaps it is, in a way, as a writer I’ve always had these sort of running dialogues ripping through my mind and occasionally they ended up on paper or computer screen.
They are often seem endless. Non-stop, going at the speed of light thoughts that are questions, ponderings, annoyances, wonder, shock, stupor…you name it - it’s in there. Then suddenly…nothing. Yep, it all stops and I feel a kind of statis. As though my mind simply went on vacation and really I’ve said or thought every thing there is to say or think and well stick a fork in me cuz I’m done.
Still, even when I’m in that empty-headed state I still feel the urge to express thoughts, ideas, points of view. Is it arrogance on my part? That I believe that my thoughts are so important that I must commit them to paper and publish them on the Internet, or (so the dream goes) in books and magazines, newspapers? I mean, really, what is so special about me that I have the irrepressible(sp) urge to force my views on others? Am I forcing or am I simply looking for a meeting of the minds across the great spatial divide of cyberspace? Am I looking for understanding, agreement or just a safe, warm place to rest my weary head? Could be all of the above or none of the above.
Are bloggers really just writers who have turned to technology to get their message out? Or are we all just a bunch of losers who need to air our problems, concerns, insecurities and little life tragedies just to feel okay about ourselves?
I wonder, I really do wonder about this stuff. Particularly on days when I don’t feel especially funny or witty. See, in case you missed it that is my thing. Don’t know why but really I live to make people laugh. I would go through just about anything to put somebody in hysterics. Do you think that is a sterling quality or a character flaw? I don’t know. Do you?
During my short adventure as a blogger I have read and visited many blogs. Many more than I ever would have thought I could or would want to. Initially I think it was curiosity. Like, gee there are bagillions of blogs out there and there must be something to this stuff, you know? I mean jeez everybody seems to be doing it - maybe if I read enough of them, I’ll know why.
But despite my research and reading and following and discovering of the many blogs I’ve found and stumbled upon, I still am no closer to answering that curiosity than I was the day I started.
When it comes to blogging it seems there is something for everyone - knitters, political junkies, writers, poets, dancers, artists, musicians, geniuses and idiots alike. But in the greater scheme of things does it really contribute to the oneness of the allness of the human community? Or are we all just trying to vent enough to get through the day without committing murder and mayhem? Trying to get by the things in our lives that disappoint and baffle?
I know in my case sometimes the only thing I had to look forward to was blogging later in the day. Or at least responding to comments from readers. That little burst of joy I felt whenever I saw I had a comment on something I’d written. But why? Do I need that validation from readers? Is it important? Is it silly?
If I pulled the plug tomorrow on my blogs would it matter? I mean truly - would it change a thing other than for me? LOL - I’m just totally lost on this topic. Cuz I really don’t know.
And honestly, I don’t have a big bang up ending for this entry - so I guess I’ll just leave you guys with the questions for now. Hopefully somebody has some insight or at least a couple of funny come-backs.
Later kids.
WC
The Blog Gods Are Angry!#$%@&*!
Posted on January 12, 2007 - Filed Under Blogging, Dear Readers..., Deep thoughts, Humor, Just For Fun, Life, Random Thoughts, Rants/Opinions, WTF?, acts of idiocy, acts of valor, adventure, bad hair day, blog gods, clueless, dasterdly deeds, double yoiks, funny bone, head exploding, hysterical, i dunno, in my head, laughs, little rants, my opinions, rat bastards, really stupid shit, satire, temporary insanity, voices in my head
First of all let me just say this is all Bill Gates’ fault! The dawg!
Okay, I’ve been blogging for a little while now- I think I’ve learned the ropes more or less. Know how not to crash my hard-drive, or blow up my computer, can’t write code but sort kinda know what it is, right? Right. Got a photobucket account, just like my mentor told me to - learned how to download pics so they don’t look like you’ve just had a hit of acid or something. Can tag surf, check my comments, response to readers in bold, add links and blah, blah, blah. Right?
So suffice to say that given the glorious ease that Wordpress gives you in blogging - I can function within the normal confines of blogging. I’m not a blackbelt or anything - but I know my way around the ol’ blogosphere. And yet….
In my adventures as a blogger I have had to actually shut down a blog and reopen it under a different name because one day I just couldn’t add categories to my posts. For you layman out there, those are ‘tags’ ‘keywords’ that people use to find subject matter on the net. I tried and tried. But there was clearly no way to trick the system - even tech support was baffled. So - okay, no big deal transfer the blog over and start again.
Then I’ve had posts just disappear. Now you see it now you don’t. Again, some sort of glitch in the cyber universe, as I’ve commiserated with others whose posts have vaporized as well.
I’ve had code that simply refused to be deleted and finally won because after two hours you just say uncle. Which resulted in half the post being in one font and the other half in another.
I’ve had regular readers end up in the spam box, rather than having their comments posted and spammers doing pingbacks, making nonsequitor posts and happily running down the halls, spraying graffitti everywhere.
Not long ago, I added a bright new blogger to my blogroll. He’s bright, funny and a pleasure to read. And I thought, what the heck, I like this guy and I’m linking him. No problem, right? Well the weird thing is that whenever I click on the link I get redirected to some weird admin link and one of those insipid messages that says basically ’screw you, you’re not getting in.’ I’ve recently discovered that if I’m logged out I can sometimes actually access his page. Sigh. So, I’m trying Chris.
Then today - well I had this cute little post all set up about snow in L.A. and a great little vid to go with it. But nope, wasn’t going to happen. The last two hours have been chewed up trying to make it work and it just goes into download hell and never arrives.
Poor tech support, I’ve emailed them so much lately that surely I’m in their permanent spam list - and pain in the ass file. And who could blame them? I feel like that little old lady who is always bringing stuff back to the store insisting it doesn’t work but of course it works for everyone else.
So, now I’m sure of it. It is simply the Great Blog Gods in the sky. They are pissed at me. They are making me pay. They got an email from Bill Gates telling them I refuse to download yet another version of his piece-of-shit IE browser and they are conspiring against me. They’re all up there smoking cigars, counting their money, drinking beers and laughing their asses off. Trying to figure out how else they can screw with me. The rat bastards!
Well, I will not relent! I will not download that hideous browser. They can torment me all they like. I still refuse to be herded like cows into their mindless one-world order composed of all of those who must obey! (Can you hear the trumpets now?)
Give me liberty or screw you! I have not yet begun to bitch! I will prevail!
Phew…I feel better now. Have a nice day. 
WC
