Old Friends
Posted on October 1, 2008 - Filed Under I gots to have it, Touchstones, adventure, friends, kindred
Don’t you just love them? Especially the ones you haven’t talked to in ages and when you pick up the phone and give them a call, it’s as though nothing has changed. You still have so much to talk about and laugh about - and damn it’s just good to hear their voice and remember how much you really dig them? Yep. That’s one of the good, good things in life, isn’t it?
I had the pleasure of talking to an old friend last night and I’m still smiling. It was just great to talk to them and yak about…everything really. And even though we talked for three hours we still had a lot more to say to each other. I really love that, don’t you? Someone you like so much that you never really run out of things to say or talk about.
It’s so easy to get wrapped up in the daily crap and what is stressing you out at the moment and forget to stay in touch and all that. Ah, but when I do get back in touch I forget about the stress and remember why I really like this person - that I own a little piece of them and they own a little piece of me and that’s how it should be.
So, sorry no funny saracasm, no rapier wit - I’m just really happy that I spent a lot of time last night talking to an old friend.
Life is Short…
Posted on September 6, 2008 - Filed Under Dear Readers..., Family, Life, friends, love
This year has been a helluva experience - a lot of good, a lot of bad, a lot of suprises, a lot of lot of… And Jesus Christ, it ain’t over yet. I’m wondering if I have enough St. John’s Wort to last me. Probably not.
Life can turn on a dime, to coin a phrase (pun intended) and you never think any of that crappy stuff is going to hit your door and muck up your plans - but it does. And usually just when you think things are looking pretty okay.
I don’t particularly want to ruminate or lament about things - but I do want to say that life is short, sometimes much shorter than you think it’s going to be - so my friends, don’t sweat the small stuff and enjoy everything there is to enjoy in your lives while it’s here - while you have it.
If you’ve had a fight, make up with them, forgive them or get them to forgive you. A flat tire is just a flat tire. You can buy a new one pretty much anywhere. Blog stats, comments mean nothing if someone you love is in trouble. Give your dog an extra doggie treat, play with your kids, hug your mom, tell everyone you love that you love them. Go on the big roller coaster, drive too fast, let the wind mess up your hair, eat the chocolate or the fresh baked bread, the hell with the calories. Write with your heart, read with passion, appreciate the efforts of others. Be there for your friends, be there for yourself. Grab it all while the grabbing is good.
I love you all and thank you for being here, I’m here for you too, only an email away.
Hi Honey, I’m Home
Posted on August 26, 2008 - Filed Under Dear Readers..., Just For Fun, adventure, friends, joy of creating
Hey Kids!
Yup, I’m back. And what an adventure I’ve had, which I will definitely tell you all about once I’ve had a chance to catch up and catch my breath. And handle a few comments…jeez, there’s a lot of them. Wow, thank you!
And thanks to Moe for keeping an eye on the place - things look just great honey, no dried food on the walls or anything. And look you left me a fresh pot of coffee and a nice chocolate cake too. Thanks, sweetie pie.
In the meantime, here are a few pics of my trip. Nice, eh? Nope, you will see none with me in them because, well, I was taking the pictures. Hehe.
Good to be back.
Is Virtual Reality – Reality?
Posted on August 7, 2008 - Filed Under Deep thoughts, Family, adventure, friends, life metaphor
I know this is somewhat of a cliché question – we all write about it. The differences between ‘real’ life and virtual life. How people can pretend to be anything or anyone that they want on the Internet essentially with impunity and get away with the most outrageous things sometimes. And of course I am not talking about spamming people’s email boxes with viagra ads. I’m talking about some pretty serious and nasty stuff. Child porn, abductions, identity theft and so on and so forth ad nauseum. But I want to take a little further spin around this block beyond the usual path that is traveled with this line of thinking.
I want to talk about love. LOL – gee that sounds like the beginning of disco song or something. Now before you start getting glazed eyes at the prospect of my doing a post about EHarmony or something hear me out for minute.
Long before there were computers, the internet, television, radio, telephones and any immediate type of communication medium, there were letters. As was the custom many moons ago, people wrote letters to one another, long letters, meaningful letters, letters that told of their secrets, their dreams, their hearts and sometimes the farming news and the condition of Aunt Marion’s bunions. It was also often the case that men and women fell in love through the medium of letters – Elizabeth Barrett Browning and Robert Browning are a well known and famous example of such a love affair. During their 20 month courtship they exchanged nearly 600 letters. And if you have ever had the pleasure and joy of reading any of these letters you will discover that in fact it is possible to first find your way to love through words. And if you have not read any of these letters, do yourself a favor and read some of them. It will restore your belief in the human heart and in love.
So, tracking up the 21st century – or whatever century we’re in because last I heard there was some debate about it and I can’t be too bothered with it – the letter, has been replaced with the email (essentially). Though often emails are more like grocery lists and jotted scribbles across kitchen pads and are used as a quick efficient modern shorthand to get some basic ideas across, they too are letters. I don’t know about you but I have been known to write some very long emails and had some very long emails returned to me. I have had what I can only describe as a ‘saga’ between myself and some others where the exchange of emails numbered up to 100 over the course of a week. So strong and intense was the need to deliver and receive the ideas and concepts being discussed. For me, communication is communication. The fact that someone cannot see me nor hear my voice does not mean nor make my communication false or insincere. Or that of anyone else.
Bloggers may in particular understand this because eventually you become a part of a sort neighborhood, where you find like minded individuals who share interests, worries, troubles and joys in common through the mutual reading of the blogs. This often begins friendships and emails, chats and sometimes even phone calls ensue. In my case I can say that I have found two lifelong friends all because of the internet and email and online activities. But they are actually more than friends, I truly think of them as family. How this began and how it continued and why it even came about I guess is irrelevent but these two people are no less unbelievably and undeniably loved friends than they would be if we had grown up next door to each other. Phone calls, gifts, birthday cards, care packages, emails all have been exchanged and frequently and regularly and they are part of the paradigm of my life. I honestly cannot imagine my life without them in it. And one of them lives on the other side of the world, literally.
So the question then is how does this happen? How can you come to love someone you have never met as though they were your family? As though you grew up in the same house with them or worked at the desk next to them for the last twenty years. I’m not sure I know the answer but I will give a guess. I think that as human beings regardless of the environment we find ourselves in we give off clues of who we are, what we think, what we like, dislike, are afraid of, hope for and that can actually be perceived by another human if the connection is strong enough and the desire exists.
I have to laugh when I hear people say (write) that they are nothing like they seem on their blogs or on the internet, etc. etc. because of course they must be because they created whatever presence they are in that medium, whether they write about diaper bargains or heartfelt memoirs. A piece of them is there for anyone who has an eye to see it. Not all of them of course, but certainly some part, I don’t see how it could possibly be otherwise.
And it is also human nature to be drawn to anything kindred, in whatever form a person finds it. That they find it online, thanks to some whacky exchange of energy and wavelengths seems to me, irrelevent. Things do happen for a reason. People do cross paths for a reason – the how and where I think is secondary to the reason. So, while there are one million and one reasons to be cautious about meeting people online, becoming friends or even perhaps more – and rightfully so – there are also reasons to remember that the written word has been the medium for companionship, friendship and even love for longer than any of us have been on this earth and so to stay open to the possibility of that I think is worth the risk of being tricked, disappointed or just flat out wrong. You never know, you could end up with two lifelong friends and maybe more.
Miracles Do Happen!
Posted on July 21, 2008 - Filed Under Family, Touchstones, brave women, friends, hope, my heart, wishes
Some of you may know that this past May, a very close friend of mine was in a really bad car accident. So bad in fact, that I wasn’t sure she was going to live. To say this turned my world upside down puts it mildly, the last time I was this grief stricken was the day my father died, if that puts it in perspective. Kelly is one of those really special people who lights up a room whenever she enters. She is kind, caring, funny and will do anything for anybody.
Not long after the accident, I flew to Seattle to help in whatever way I could and to join the literally hundreds of other people who knew and loved Kelly in a massive prayer chain to bring her through this catastrophe and give her back to us. It was a very rough week for me and I was in no way prepared to see what had happened to her and to realize how very little I could do for her. Much of the time I spent just trying not to cry and to keep her gorgeous girls occupied. Really, it was in God’s hands and all we could do was pray and send her our love and hope for the best. There wasn’t much sleeping or laughing going on but there was a lot of love and a sort of instant kindredness among all us. Lots of hugs and tears and smiles and hand squeezes. We all wanted the same thing - for our Kelly to get well and weather the storm.
The day I returned to L.A. from Seattle I discovered Kelly said her first words. And fittingly they were to her mother, Charlene. She said, ‘thank you’ when she saw Charlene straightening up her hospital room. Somewhat startled Charlene went to Kelly’s bedside and and looked closely at her daughter and said, “Do you know who I am?”
Kelly said, “yes.”
Charlene asked. “Who am I?”
Kelly said, “Mom.”
And that was the beginning of the miracle. Not only had she lived through a 60 mph impact into her standing still car, she spoke and she remembered her mother. Over the ensuing weeks, I read her brother’s email updates on her progress and it was amazing, lesser men would have died. But Kelly with the spirit of a team of Clydesdales pushed through to each next level with flying colors. Still, I have to admit, I was worried and wondered how much of her memory she had lost. If she had sustained any serious or long term brain damage. If she would be Kelly again. I knew while I was there she didn’t know me. In fact, I’m not sure she has any memory of that week at all. I worried (selfishly) that maybe she would never remember me and we would have to find our way to friendship in a new chapter.
I worried too about her young daughters, her brothers, her parents, her husband - if they too would get their Kelly back.
Today, my prayers were answered. I called her mother to get an update and to see where I could send cards and such to Kelly (since she’s been constantly been transferring to new facilities) and Charlene told me that Kelly now has a cell phone that she is talking to friends on. Charlene gave me the number and of course I called it immediately. Unfortunately, I got the voice mail and left a message.
For hours afterwards, every time the phone rang, I jumped and grabbed it, hoping to hear her voice. When I finally gave up the hope that I’d hear from her, she called. When she said my name I started to cry from pure joy. It was my Kelly. It was really her. The relief and gratitude I felt I simply can’t describe. We talked on the phone for nearly an hour and it was just as though nothing had happened. I have my friend back. I didn’t lose her after all. And I’m so glad because I just couldn’t have imagined life without her.
So thank you, a million times to all of you who prayed for her, hoped for her and her family. Who sent out your love to a stranger, only because I asked you to. Your prayers have worked and have helped to create this wonderful miracle.
Between Friends - Interview with Anonymum
Posted on June 23, 2008 - Filed Under Just For Fun, friends
Most of you are probably aware that Moe has been doing interviews like a mad woman on a Harley over at the Nook of Oz. If you don’t skedaddle on over there and check them out. Today, my interview is up - or should be going up soon. I thought it only fair though, that we turn the tables and get a little chatfest going with our very own Baba Wawa.
I found Moe’s answers honest, candid and in some cases, a little surprising. I think you’ll find it all very interesting and perhaps it will give you a look into another layer of a woman, so many call Mum. And with no furthe adieu…
1. What is the greatestest injustice you have ever suffered in your life and have you forgiven the perpetrator?
When my sister gave evidence in the family law court for my then husband, during a custody battle. Her testimony was that I was an unfit mother and didn’t deserve to have the girls live with me. It created a siutation where I didn’t speak to her for over 20 years, and it’s only in the last 18 months I’ve come to the conclusion it was time to let it be. I can be somewhat pigheaded at times. Most of me has forgiven her, yes, a part of me will never forgive her and it will never, as long as I live be forgotten, nor will it be understood how you could do that to a family member. Did no fucking good anyway, I ended up with the girls when it was over. I had the last say in the end.
2. What is the biggest lie that people tell themselves and do you tell the same lie to yourself?
That past wrongs against them have been forgiven and forgotten, and that nothing has ever affected them long term. The more I see of people, the more I believe it. Every person alive has issues with one thing or another. To deny it is an outright lie. Yes, absolutely I’ve been guilty of it, just not so much these days. Time and age bring a self awareness and the freedom to admit there have been past events which continue to haunt you no matter what. Everybody has demons. It’s just that some of us are more willing to admit it than others. It’s not an easy thing to admit you’re not 110% well adjusted. I’m there right now, so I speak from first hand experience.
3. What one unanswered dream are you still unwilling to let go of, no matter how improbable the realization?
This was a hard one, Annie. I had to think extra hard about it. Truth be told, owning a boat to live on. That, to me, represents the ultimate in personal freedom. When you get sick of one place you up anchor and find another. You cant do that with a house. Someone said to me once that I would never be happy staying in the one place for too long no matter what. It would seem from this answer they were right. The idea of going from one place to another as the fancy takes me is one I’ve had for as long as I can remember.
4. If you could make time stand still and keep one moment from your past, what moment would that be?
This question gave me pause, and in fact I had a different answer, then changed my mind. The original answer was far too contentious to be verbalised if that makes sense? I weighed up the pro’s and con’s, and the very first time Mark kissed me would win hands down! This husband of mine has a way of kissing me passionatley that makes me feel like I’m the only person on earth he’s EVER kissed, and the only person he ever WANTED to kiss. I tell him regularly he has the softest, most fuckable mouth I’ve ever come across {yes, pun intended!} and I’ll stand by that till the day I die. That first one was an absolute doozy! If it was possible to physically relive it over and over again, I would.
5. If you could ask anyone in the world (whether living or dead, celebrity or common man) one question, who would it be and what would you ask?
JFK. Did he ever suspect he would be assassinated and if so, would he have avoided that place on that fateful day? Yeah, that’s close to 2, but the answer to one without the other bit would be useless I think. I’m greedy. What can I say? Besides, if I had the opportunity, I’m not passing it up!
6. If you could have anything in the world that you wanted, which wasn’t a material item, what would it be?
The ability to sing, and sing well. No hesitation here. I would love to be able to move people with songs.
7. What does blogging fulfill for you - or does it?
This was hard because I’ve never seen it as fulfilling anything. Having said that, it brought me you, Michael and Evyl, all 3 of whom are extra special to me, plus many other people I can relate to. Perhaps that’s the fulfillment and I simply never realised it until now?
8. What is your favorite made up word (by you) and give us its definition.
I have to go with snortle. It’s a term I use to describe when Mark is asleep beside me, snoring his head off! He’s snortling!!! Now that’s a real Morkyism!
9. If you had met Mark earlier in your life, do you think you would have had the good sense to marry him then or would you have blown it?
I’m not convinced Mark and I would have what we have now had I met him earlier. We both needed to experience what we had to that point, in order to understand the way the other thought, and why each of us were as wary of the feelings that engulfed us at the time. Mine and Mark’s story is one that defies any logical explanation. Many, many people speak of love at first sight, we experienced it. It’s like there was “something” that physically maifested itself the minute we spoke on the phone. The first call ever lasted more than 5 hours and by that time I was close to being in love sight unseen, and he says the same. The minute we laid eyes on each other, we were both gone! I’m not 100% convinced it would have been that way had me met before we both went to hell and back a couple of times. In fact I don’t think we would even have liked each other before that. At the time I met him, I was looking for a fuck buddy, nothing more, nothing less. 6 months later we married in a cloud of love that has never really dissipated. It seems to get lost among the daily grind of life now and then, but when I look around the problems hard enough and really make the effort? I still see the cloud. It’s a love that endures, and I’m not sure if we had been any younger that we would have found the type of love and connection I speak of.
10. What situation or action would cause you to accost and bitch slap a total stranger, regardless of the consequences?
If they threatened my husband, children or grandchildren in any way shape or form. There would be NO hesitation. They’d go down like a bag of shit!!! And in fact I’ve done it. No shock there I guess?
Thanks, Moe, for your candid and very interesting answers - you’ve impressed me once again, with your utter lack of guile and your trademark straightforwardness. And…you even surprised me on a couple of these - in a fun way. Love ya!
Tourist
Posted on June 10, 2008 - Filed Under Family, friends
I am the ghost at your bedside
hovering closely to hear
your whispers
I am the anchor that tethers
your spirit to this world
giving you plenty of line
though not release.
I am the voice that sounds
in your aching head and lies
to you for your own good
So you will get well.
I am the fretter select
who clucks and tends
a poor substitute
but…a willing one.
I am the city you left for love
but remain a fan of its lights
now returning to you
as a weary and devoted tourist.
Purple Socks
Posted on May 27, 2008 - Filed Under Uncategorized, brave women, breathe, friends
I put on purple socks today
which made me think of you
I walked them out into the day
and wished the sky to blue
I bought a box of chocolates
and ate them in your stead
I called up God and placed my bets
then uttered prayers in bed
I forced myself to belly laugh
and make it very loud
and gathered lillies along the path
to chase away your clouds
I tried to do the many things
that inform the world of you
in deepest hope that angel’s wings
will fly us back to true
copyright 2008
Please Pray for my Friend
Posted on May 20, 2008 - Filed Under Family, friends
This morning I woke up to find an email in my inbox that sent me reeling. A very close friend of mine, Kelly, was in a very bad car accident yesterday afternoon. She is currently in the ICU and has brain damage. Some of you may know her as KellyToo, as she visited some of your blogs in the past.
She has two young children who really need her and a great husband and family.
She’s a wonderful mom, friend and person. She has a great laugh and is someone so full of life it is hard to imagine her not running around filling the air with laughter and fun.
The details of what happened to her are still a bit sketchy, but it doesn’t sound good. I will likely being going up there, possibly today. I am waiting to hear back from her husband.
I may not be around for a bit. But I ask you to please pray for my friend and her family. They need every prayer they can get.
Annie
When I’m 64
Posted on October 6, 2007 - Filed Under Humor, Just For Fun, brain farts, friends, kindred, laughs
[ HT to my buddy Jenny 
]
Two old ladies, Maude & Mabel, are outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke. When it starts to rain, Mabel pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, fits it over her cigarette, and continues smoking.
Maude: What in the hell is that?
Mabel: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn’t get wet.
Maude: Where in the hell did you get it?
Mabel: You can get them at any drugstore.
The next day, Maude hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.
The pharmacist, obviously surprised since Maude is quite ancient, but it is not his place to judge.
Pharmacist: Is there any particular brand that you prefer, Madame?
Maude: Doesn’t matter Sonny, as long as it fits on a Camel.
At which point, the pharmacist promptly fainted.
